Dear Government:

I received this letter in the mail today, hoping the content of it would be good news.

To my surprise, you denied my claim.

I’m glad that my disability isn’t “severe nor prolonged” enough for you.
On your website, this is what you define as a disability:

What we mean by “disability”

To qualify for a disability benefit under the Canada Pension Plan (CPP), a disability must be both “severe” and “prolonged”, and it must prevent you from being able to work at any job on a regular basis.

• Severe means that you have a mental or physical disability that regularly stops you from doing any type of substantially gainful work.

• Prolonged means that your disability is long-term and of indefinite duration or is likely to result in death.

Both the “severe” and “prolonged” criteria must be met simultaneously at the time of application. There is no common definition of “disability” in Canada. Even if you qualify for a disability benefit under other government programs or from private insurers, you may not necessarily qualify for a CPP disability benefit.

I’m extremely disappointed. Heartbroken really. Just more added stress that I didn’t think I would have to deal with. I sent you my pathology report, stating that I have breast cancer, I sent you my mammogram results, my MRI results, my surgeon wrote a letter stating that I needed a full mastectomy and that I will be receiving treatment afterwards. I didn’t think you needed anything more. I thought having cancer would be enough for you.

I have 90 days to write a letter and get more medical reports to send off to you, hoping that you will reconsider.

Here’s what you’ve missed..

I’m 27, just found out that I have breast cancer and that I need surgery as soon as possible. Was told that I couldn’t save my breast, that I needed a full mastectomy. Had surgery 20 days later, the day before my 28th birthday. During surgery they injected radiation into me, this was so they could find my lymph nodes better.- But you knew I already had the surgery.
15 days later, I had more radiation put into me for my bone scan. During this time I also had what is called axillary web syndrome, also known as cording in my arm. It develops as a side effect of sentinel lymph node biopsy or axillary lymph node dissection- which I had both done. This long cord developed under my armpit, went down to my elbow and all the way to my wrist. It was painful and tight, making it difficult for me to lift my arm any higher than my shoulder, and I couldn’t extend my elbow fully. This pain and limited range of motion had a huge impact on my day-to-day life.
A few weeks later I had my genetic test done. Still don’t know the results of this test yet, but I’m hoping that I don’t have a genetic mutation that makes me have the breast cancer gene. A couple days after that, it was determined that my cancer will benefit from chemotherapy. I started chemo on Thursday, April 13th.
Before starting chemo, I had time to save my eggs. I did the fertility stuff for 12 days. I stabbed needles in my belly for 12 days. I did the retrieval and they said I had 10 mature eggs and that they will be made into embryos.
The day after my first chemo (Friday, April 14th) I got the call that my eggs did not survive. So not only is it the day after my first chemo, where my immune is so low that I can get very ill, but I am now grieving about my future children, trying not to get too upset because my health is at risk.- This will be another blog, but I was told that I’m under extreme stress and that having all the radiation put into me did not help.
They say after your first round of chemo your hair will start to fall out 2-3 weeks later. I’m currently on week 2. So soon enough my hair will be falling out and I will be bald. Try being a 28 year old women, diagnosed with breast cancer and now having her hair stripped away from her.
I am extremely insecure with my body. I have 1 boob- yes reconstruction surgery is possible, but I have more things to worry about before deciding on that. I will always have this scar constantly reminding me that I have cancer.
I have panic attacks when going out in public. I have to remind myself to breath and that everything is okay. I have to remember that strangers do not know what I have and what I’m going through. I have to remember to act normal.

I don’t feel normal, I’ll never feel normal, I will never be normal. I will always worry about cancer.

Mentally I am not okay… I guess I have to prove this to you.